It’s Boristime v Coronatime, and there’s only ever one winner | John Crace

Boris Johnson can’t handle being the bearer of bad news and his Commons statement rather suggested he wasn’t too bothered

Chris Whitty and Patrick Vallance must be wondering why they had gone to so much trouble the previous day to explain just how critical the coronavirus rates of infection had become and that the threat had now risen back to level four. For after a few token nods to the gravity of the situation – “a stitch in time saves nine” – Boris Johnson used his Commons statement to introduce a few minor tweaks to lockdown restrictions that rather suggested he wasn’t too bothered.

He wanted schools, colleges, universities and businesses to remain open – with the one proviso that all those he had previously threatened with the sack if they didn’t go back to work were now advised to work from home if at all possible. His biggest change was that pubs, restaurants and bars should now all close at 10pm – it has apparently been proved that the coronavirus is mainly a nocturnal creature and is most contagious after dark – though people were obviously free to go home in groups of six, get totally hammered and infect one another afterwards.

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